| Billy Crystal | ... | Himself - Host |
| rest of cast listed alphabetically: |
 | Shohreh Aghdashloo | ... | Herself - Nominee: Best Actress in a Supporting Role |
| Liam Aiken | ... | Himself |
| Denys Arcand | ... | Himself - Best Foreign Language Film Winner |
| George Axelrod | ... | Himself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Alec Baldwin | ... | Himself - Nominee: Best Actor in a Supporting Role / Co-presenter: Best Documentary Feature |
| Alan Bates | ... | Himself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Jack Black | ... | Himself - Co-presenter: Best Song |
| Béatrice Bonifassi | ... | Herself - Performer ("Belleville Rendez-vou") |
| Russell Boyd | ... | Himself - Best Cinematography Winner (also archive footage) |
| Philippa Boyens | ... | Herself - Best Adapted Screenplay Winner |
| Christopher Boyes | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Sound |
| Stan Brakhage | ... | Himself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Adrien Brody | ... | Himself - Presenter: Best Actress in a Leading Role |
| Charles Bronson | ... | Himself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Pierce Brosnan | ... | Himself - Co-presenter: Best Editing |
| Sandra Bullock | ... | Herself (Co-Presenter) |
| T-Bone Burnett | ... | Himself - Performer: 'The Scarlet Tide' |
| Nicolas Cage | ... | Himself - Presenter: 'Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World' Film Clip |
| Art Carney | ... | Himself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Jim Carrey | ... | Himself - Presenter: Honorary Award to Blake Edwards |
| Keisha Castle-Hughes | ... | Herself - Nominee: Best Actress in a Leading Role |
| Benoît Charest | ... | Himself - Performer: 'Belleville Rendez-vous' |
| César Charlone | ... | Himself - Nominee: Best Cinematography (archive footage) |
| Patricia Clarkson | ... | Herself - Nominee: Best Actress in a Supporting Role |
| Phil Collins | ... | Himself - Co-presenter: Best Original Score |
| Sean Connery | ... | Himself - making opening announcement |
| Randall William Cook | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Visual Effects |
| Chris Cooper | ... | Himself - Presenter: Best Supporting Actress |
| Francis Ford Coppola | ... | Himself - Co-presenter: Best Adapted Screenplay |
| Sofia Coppola | ... | Herself - Winner: Best Original Screenplay / Nominee: Best Picture, Best Director / Co-presenter: Best Adapted Screenplay |
| Elvis Costello | ... | Himself - Performer: 'The Scarlet Tide' |
| Jeanne Crain | ... | Herself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Shane Bitney Crone | ... | Himself |
| Hume Cronyn | ... | Himself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Tom Cruise | ... | Himself - Presenter: Best Director |
| Jamie Lee Curtis | ... | Herself - Presenter: Song Performances from 'A Mighty Wind, ' 'The Triplets of Belleville' |
| John Cusack | ... | Himself - Co-presenter: Best Documentary Short |
| Maryann DeLeo | ... | Herself - Winner: Best Documentary Short |
| Benicio Del Toro | ... | Himself - Nominee: Best Supporting Actor |
| Johnny Depp | ... | Himself |
| Ngila Dickson | ... | Herself - Winner: Best Costume Design |
| Michael Douglas | ... | Himself |
| Clint Eastwood | ... | Himself - Nominee: Best Picture, Best Director (archive footage) |
| Buddy Ebsen | ... | Himself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Blake Edwards | ... | Himself - Honorary Award Recipient |
| Jack Elam | ... | Himself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Adam Elliot | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Animated Short |
| Will Ferrell | ... | Himself - Co-presenter: Best Song |
| Alex Funke | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Visual Effects |
| Jennifer Garner | ... | Herself - Host: Scientific and Technical Awards Banquet |
| Buddy Hackett | ... | Himself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Tom Hanks | ... | Himself - Presenter: Bob Hope Tribute |
| Marcia Gay Harden | ... | Herself - Nominee: Best Actress in a Supporting Role |
| Michael Hedges | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Sound |
| David Hemmings | ... | Himself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Dan Hennah | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Art Direction |
| Katharine Hepburn | ... | Herself (Special Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Wendy Hiller | ... | Herself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Gregory Hines | ... | Himself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Bob Hope | ... | Himself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Holly Hunter | ... | Herself - Nominee: Best Actress in a Supporting Role |
| Peter Jackson | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Picture, Best Director, Best Adapted Screenplay |
| Michael Jeter | ... | Himself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Scarlett Johansson | ... | Herself - Presenter: Best Makeup |
| Angelina Jolie | ... | Herself - Presenter: Best Art Direction |
| Elia Kazan | ... | Himself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Diane Keaton | ... | Herself - Nominee: Best Actress in a Leading Role |
| Nicole Kidman | ... | Herself - Presenter: Best Actor in a Leading Role |
| Peter King | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Makeup |
| Richard King | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Sound Editing |
| Ben Kingsley | ... | Himself - Nominee: Best Actor in a Leading Role |
| Alison Krauss | ... | Herself - Performer: 'You Will Be My Ain True Love, ' 'The Scarlet Tide' |
| Diane Lane | ... | Herself - Co-presenter: Best Documentary Short |
| Hope Lange | ... | Herself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Jude Law | ... | Himself - Nominee: Best Actor in a Leading Role |
| Dave LeBolt | ... | Himself - accepting Award of Merit (pre-recorded) |
| Heath Ledger | ... | Himself - Audience Member |
| Alan Lee | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Art Direction |
| Annie Lennox | ... | Herself - Best Song Winner / Performer: 'Into the West' |
| Joe Letteri | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Visual Effects |
| Eugene Levy | ... | Himself - Performer: 'A Kiss at the End of the Rainbow (as Mitch & Mickey) |
| Tobey Maguire | ... | Himself - Presenter: 'Seabiscuit' Film Clip |
| Grant Major | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Art Direction |
| Michael McKean | ... | Himself-Nominee:Best Original Song |
| Ian McKellen | ... | Himself |
| Fernando Meirelles | ... | Himself - Nominee: Best Director (archive footage) |
| Ann Miller | ... | Herself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Julianne Moore | ... | Herself - Co-Presenter: Best Film Editing |
| Karen Morley | ... | Herself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Errol Morris | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Documentary Feature |
| Samantha Morton | ... | Herself - Nominee: Best Actress in a Leading Role |
| Bill Murray | ... | Himself - Presenter: 'Lost in Translation' Film Clip |
| David Newman | ... | Himself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Donald O'Connor | ... | Himself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Catherine O'Hara | ... | Perfomer: 'A Kiss at the End of the Rainbow' (as Mitch & Mickey) |
| Ron O'Neal | ... | Himself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Barrie M. Osborne | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Picture |
| Annette O'Toole | ... | Herself-Nominee: Best Original Song |
| Peter Parks | ... | Himself - Gordon E. Sawyer Award Recipient (pre-recorded) (as Peter D. Parks) |
| Gregory Peck | ... | Himself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Hammond Peek | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Sound |
| Sean Penn | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Actor in a Leading Role |
| Frank Pierson | ... | Himself - Academy President, presenting Memorial Tribute |
| Jada Pinkett Smith | ... | Herself - Co-presenter: Best Visual Effects |
| Leni Riefenstahl | ... | Herself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| John Ritter | ... | Himself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Miles Robbins | ... | Himself |
| Tim Robbins | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Supporting Actor / Co-presenter: Best Original Screenplay |
| Denise Robert | ... | Herself - Best Foreign Language Film Winner |
| Julia Roberts | ... | Herself - Presenter: Katharine Hepburn Tribute |
| Jim Rygiel | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Visual Effects |
| Andrew J. Sacks | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Live Action Short |
| Susan Sarandon | ... | Herself - Co-presenter: Best Original Screenplay |
| John Schlesinger | ... | Himself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Aaron Schneider | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Live Action Short |
| John Schwartzman | ... | Himself - Nominee: Best Cinematography (archive footage) |
| John Seale | ... | Himself - Nominee: Best Cinematography (archive footage) |
| Jamie Selkirk | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Film Editing |
| Michael Semanick | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Sound |
| Eduardo Serra | ... | Himself - Nominee: Best Cinematography (archive footage) |
| Marc Shaiman | ... | Himself - Conductor |
| Howard Shore | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Original Score, Best Original Song |
| Will Smith | ... | Himself - Co-presenter: Best Visual Effects |
| Steven Spielberg | ... | Himself - Presenter: Best Picture |
| Robert Stack | ... | Himself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Andrew Stanton | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Animated Feature |
| Ray Stark | ... | Himself (Memorial Tribute) (archive footage) |
| Ben Stiller | ... | Himself - Co-presenter: Best Live Short and Best Animated Short |
| Sting | ... | Himself - Co-presenter: Best Score / Performer: 'You Will Be My Ain True Love' |
| Richard Taylor | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Costume Design, Best Makeup |
| Charlize Theron | ... | Herself - Winner: Best Actress / Presenter: Best Foreign Language Film |
| Uma Thurman | ... | Herself - Co-presenter: Best Cinematography |
| Bill Tondreau | ... | Himself - Award of Merit Recipient (pre-recorded) |
| John Travolta | ... | Himself - Co-presenter: Best Sound, Best Sound Editing |
| Liv Tyler | ... | Herself - Presenter: Best Song nominees "Into the West", "The Scarlet Tide", "You Will Be My Ain' True Love" |
| Fran Walsh | ... | Herself - Winner: Best Picture, Best Adapted Screenplay, Best Original Song |
| Naomi Watts | ... | Herself - Nominee: Best Actress in a Leading Role / Co-presenter: Best Documentary Feature |
| Michael Weaver | ... | Himself |
| Peter Weir | ... | Himself - Nominee: Best Picture, Best Director (archive footage) |
| Harold Wheeler | ... | Himself - Conductor |
| Michael Williams | ... | Himself - Winner: Best Documentary Feature |
| Robin Williams | ... | Himself - Presenter: Best Animated Feature |
| Owen Wilson | ... | Himself - Co-presenter: Best Live Short and Best Animated Short |
| Oprah Winfrey | ... | Herself - Presenter: 'Mystic River' Film Clip |
| Renée Zellweger | ... | Herself - Winner: Best Supporting Actress / Presenter: Best Costume Design |
| Catherine Zeta-Jones | ... | Herself - Presenter: Best Supporting Actor |
| Sean Astin | ... | Himself (uncredited) |
| Billy Boyd | ... | Himself (uncredited) |
| Takashi Fujii | ... | Matthew Minami from clip "Lost in Translation" (archive footage) (uncredited) |
| Christopher Guest | ... | Himself (uncredited) |
| Sean Mathias | ... | Himself (uncredited) |
| Michael Moore | ... | Himself (uncredited) |
| Jack Nicholson | ... | Himself as Gandalf in opening spoof segment (uncredited) |
| Mickey Rooney | ... | Himself (uncredited) |
| Peter Sellers | ... | Insp. Jacques Clouseau (archive footage) (uncredited) |
| Elijah Wood | ... | Himself (uncredited) |
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company.
Seemingly endless repetition can make things grow rather tiresome, like when you hear a great song on the radio a few hundred times, you start to hate it. I still love all of the Lord of the Rings movies and remain immensely impressed by them, but I have to admit that by the end of the 76th Academy Awards, I was getting a little tired of hearing about it. I'm sure it has something to do with the fact that the last movie to sweep the Oscars like that was the ridiculous Titanic, which certainly deserved some of the awards that it won but it is absolutely ludicrous to call it the Best Picture of 1997. The second sequel in the Lord of the Rings trilogy is the third in an absolutely spectacular trilogy, I guess it just takes away a lot of the appeal of the awards when you hear the nominees and know immediately which one would win just because of the simple fact that it was nominated. The only thing more repetitive by the end of the night were those incessant Cadillac commercials ooh yeah, ooh ooh yeah.
That being said, I was highly impressed with this year's ceremony. The opening sequence wasn't quite as side-splitting as Jack Black's Lord of the Piercing from last year, although I loved Michael Moore's good-natured appearance during the battle scene from Return of the King, in which he rants on and on about the fictitiousness of that war before being stomped on by a gigantic beast. Billy Crystal, one of the best hosts of the Academy Awards, returns for the evening, making lots of jokes about how long it's been since he's hosted – by far my favorite of which was that, the last time he was the host, George Bush was the president, the economy was tanking and we had just finished a war with Iraq.
But overall, my favorite thing about the Academy Awards this year were things like the In Memoriam sequence and the lifetime achievement montage for Bob Hope, because they showed all those clips from all those classic films, and it really reminded me how little I know about movies. It has inspired me to start going back and watching the classics, especially since lately I've been on this weird kick where I've been watching all of the new horror movies that come out, arguably the worst of all movies released. What a waste of time. The presenters, although mostly Academy Award winners themselves, came on stage and, as always, delivered a few wooden lines of speech before naming their respective nominees.
I'll never understand why the ceremony that awards the best of the year's films and film-making is incessantly peppered with dumb jokes and stiff delivery like that, and strangely the one exception was from one of the more controversial winners last year, Adrien Brody (no, not Michael Moore). Last year he gave a teary speech about the sadness of the war in Iraq (a violation of the sort of unwritten agreement to leave your feelings about the war on the back burner during the ceremony), but even more, he planted a not-so-welcome kiss on Halle Berry on stage last year, about which he joked this year. He comes on stage, telling people not to worry because of a restraining order that has been served to him, and then sprays breath freshener into his mouth just before announcing the winner in the Best Female Actor category. I love it when people can poke fun at themselves like that.
As for the winners, Sean Penn was finally awarded the elusive Oscar for his performance in Mystic River, as did Tim Robbins for Supporting Actor in the same movie, Charlize Theron won Best Actress for Monster (silencing cynical critics who credited her performance more to make-up than acting), Renee Zellwegger received a much-deserved Supporting Female Actor for Cold Mountain, and I'm pretty sure The Lord of the Rings won just about everything else. Sophia Coppola, in fact, would surely have been snubbed had the Return of the King been an original screenplay. And then, of course, there are the awards like Best Documentary Short Subject, Best Animated Short Film and Best Live Action Short Film, but I won't get into those because no one's seen them anyway. Where do you go to see these movies? I don't even know where they come from.
Steven Spielberg announced a clean sweep as he opened the envelope for Best Picture and gave the Oscar for Best Picture to The Lord of the Rings, the movie's 11th Oscar of the night. I saw all of the Lord of the Rings movies, and I've been saying since 2002 when The Fellowship of the Ring was nominated but didn't win that if The Two Towers was also nominated and didn't win, The Return of the King would certainly win. I based my prediction on the idea that it was simply too far-fetched for all three films in a trilogy to be nominated and none of them win. I don't think that's ever happened before, but I had no idea how right I would be. I definitely didn't see 11 Oscars headed to The Return of the King, but at least they were granted to a worthy film.
I'm still bummed that Big Fish was so tremendously overlooked though. It may have earned itself the unfortunate distinction of being one of the most underrated films of the last decade or so…